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Los Angeles
===========
[They said that they were desperate for the food, yes,
and that the price of the rice was the highest outside
of Control.]
1. LIFE
Who needs Razorvision? Not me, that's for sure. Ha.
That's a lie. I need Razorvision. It's how I entertain
myself when I'm not out shooting people or fucking
beautiful clients or whatever it is that I do. You
can't imagine what Razorvision is like and I can't
imagine it either. It's like having a steel
hummingbird in your head flapping its steel wings at
super speeds as you orgasm from the pain. I've heard
some people say that Razorvision is really the Face of
God and looking at the Face of God is not allowed and
that's why people who do it get brain damage. Maybe.
Who can say that it's not true? I really don't know
what Razorvision is or what I see or experience when I
watch it. You might think this strange since I watch
Razorvision every single day but that's probably
because you've never tried it yourself. I once tried
to videotape myself watching Razorvision just so I'd
know what it was all about finally. I set up a camera
on a tripod in front of me not facing the RV set, and
just set it to record as I started watching
Razorvision alone on my sofa. Later when it was all
over I played the tape back and all I saw was myself
sitting on the sofa having seizures. It was like an
epileptic fit: my eyes rolled in the back of my head
and I started convulsing as though I were being fired
with some kind of E.C.T. (Electro Convulsive Therapy).
It was disturbing and just went on and on. I pressed
fast forward and saw myself dance that horrible
seizure dance and eventually I turned it off because I
couldn't take it anymore but oh how I love watching
Razorvision!
[Zarqawi! A representative "shelf business partner
from Osama" was called by the Administration of Bush a
"terrorist remainder of Qaeda of aluminium," which
saved itself in Iraq of Afghanistan in May 2002 for
the medical supply, and then, in order to organize
plots of the "Terror Area," he came to Iraq with
approximately two.]
2. SEX
Razorvision is expensive and the monthly subscription
fee costs more than my other expenses put together. I
don't want to be like those other RV people out there
who can't keep it together enough to keep up their
subscriptions and wind up on the street. I sometimes
drive around and look for women who can't afford to
watch Razorvision and are so desperate for it that
they'd fuck anyone for the chance to watch. I fuck
them and we watch Razorvision together after.
Thankfully most of them have watched much much more RV
than I have and are so damaged that when we're done
they forget who they are and what they're doing in my
apartment so I just ask them to leave and they do. I'm
never going to be like that because I control
Razorvision and I don't let it control me. (That's
nothing: a guy I know does the same thing except that
he fucks little boys and then lets them choose their
favourite RV program. That's really sick I think.
You'd never catch me watching children's Razorvision
programs just for a little sex.)
[Nurses her, the baby. When Drives 65 found the child
in Ohio, the woman's innocent Friday to harm but has
been sentenced the crime three other charges.]
3. WORK
So anyway I don't want to be one of those homeless
Razorvision beggars/whores so I have to keep a job and
that's why I’m a detective with my own office. I used
to have an RV set in my office but then I just watched
it all the time and never investigated any cases so I
got rid of it. So as a detective with my own office
and telephone number in the yellow pages I help
clients with whatever they need investigating. What do
clients need investigating? All sorts of things. I
can't actually remember any of my cases but I'm very
careful to keep a detailed case book so that when I
need to prove to myself that I'm actually a detective
I just take it out and try to read it except that one
of the side effects of Razorvision is bad handwriting.
I have a hard time reading my case book. My fingers
shake too much to type anything. It's a problem. Wait
did I say I was a detective? I'm not a detective. I
kill people for money.
["The total Catholic it treats the crime of sexual
abuse of the community minor with pain and the damage
which it gives. Like this, many youth (us) lack
ability or are not inclined, and shyly suffer because
it thinks it suffers all."]
4. THE CASE
I'm supposed to be investigating a case so I just
drive around until I see the person I'm supposed to
kill and check with the little picture I'm holding (I
clipped it out of a newspaper) and I jump out of my
car and before he knows what's happening he's on the
ground and I'm beating him with a brick until he stops
moving. Razorvision gives me a strange kind of hunger
so after that I drive around some more looking for
something to eat and I find this weird little Chinese
hamburger place (do the Chinese even eat hamburgers?)
where you order from a little speaker and this weird
gong sound ('GONNNNNNG!') rings and before you know it
they've brought you your food and it's a hamburger
only cut up into little pieces and you eat it with
chopsticks. As I eat it I feel proud that I can use
chopsticks because Razorvision tends to erode fine
motor control I can't really shave without cutting
myself but I can still use chopsticks! There's either
blood or ketchup on my hands and I'm a detective and
it's a mystery but then they bring out the fortune
fries which are like fortune cookies only each fry has
a little voice that tells you your fortune when you
bite into it. "You're fucked!" says the first one but
maybe that's not the fry at all. I realize it's been
hours since I've last watched Razorvision and it’s
8:53 PM. My favourite show's about to come on! By
'favourite show' I mean 'Razorvision transmission that
relieves the incredible agony of going without
Razorvision for too long,' if you know what I mean. On
the other hand I'm pretty sure that RV shows have
actors and plots and dialogue too so who knows? Maybe
I enjoy the story whatever the hell it is.
[They can achieve the lump where that is largest!
Meant that it is the time when the contest "of the
cover of the chronology God," because either one sees
turned around force-feeding of the animal, or one is
finished.]
5. RELATIONSHIPS
Yeah I have a girlfriend. I think. If I do it's
probably been a while since I've seen her and I hope
that I didn't kill her or something by mistake.
[The last multitude of sparkle of New York caused to
consternation in toys R the warehouse to us in where
the sparkle gangsters collected for his sixth
excursion.]
RAZORVISION
Wait a minute. Who the hell am I talking to?
[Click. Click. Click. Click.]
---------------------------------------------------
the parking lot is full memorial page:
http://www.plif.com
the neocass list archives:
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the new project:
fall or winter, 2003
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